One Simple Strategy to Change How You Feel
Try this simple trick to change how you feel.
1. Step back from your conversations.
2. Try not to tell yourself a story as soon as someone tells you something.
3. Truly listen and then respond.
Hey guys, it’s Allen.
I wanted to share with you in this video how you can change your emotions and how you feel…
By using one simple strategy, by using a simple step.
Now here’s what happens when someone makes you feel upset or hurts your feelings.
So what happens is – someone tells you something, then you listen to what they say, then something happens, then you feel a specific way, based on all those triggers that occur.
So what happens on that third step that make you feel a specific way?
It’s a story that you tell, a story occurs that you tell yourself, which actually is completely wrong from what the person just told you.
So for example, someone hurts your feelings.
Or you feel threatened, or you feel insecure, or you feel hurt.
Well, what happens is someone says something, you hear them, but after you hear them, you tell yourself a story.
Oh, someone in my past said something similar, and that person hurt me, therefore, I’m going to feel upset based on what this person is saying now.
Because of those past stories or past events that occurred, you have a microsecond where a story is crafted in your head based on past circumstances, which then affect what you feel, and then how you react in that conversation.
When in truth, and reality, what that person is saying to you in that time, in that moment, right then and there, is something completely new, and has nothing in relation to what occurred in the past.
So here’s what I want you to do.
I want you to take a step back from your conversations, and try not to tell a story, as soon as someone tells you something. Don’t tell a story of what you think they’re saying. Truly listen to what they are saying, and then you can then respond, based on an unbiased opinion.
This will help your communication. It will help your feelings and emotions and your personal well-being.
So I hope this helps.
I’m Allen, thanks for watching.